Bad news (of course) is that John Carter pretty much sucked. I think I have a new favorite laughably bad scene in a movie. John Carter (who can leap easily 10 times as far as he could on Earth...due to Mars having only
That, and it throws way too much mythology and what passes for plot at you. Also, while it's correct that Mars has two moons, they wouldn't be as huge in the Martian sky as they appear in the movie. But whatever.
[Correction: An earlier version said Mars had 64% of Earth's gravity. In fact, the correct number is 38%. I blame my carelessness of looking up the mass of Mars (instead of the surface gravity) and Google for prominently displaying an incorrect result among many correct ones]
Running Time: 132 minutes
My Total Minutes: 288,075