BTW, someone has to tell these young filmmakers never brag about how cheap your movie was. If you made a low-budget film and people are interested in the cost, you tell them "Under a million" and that's all. At least, that's what all the indie filmmakers were saying 5 years ago, I'm not actually in the industry so take my advice with a grain of salt.
And then...sigh...STRUGGLED REAGANS. The title actually comes from a line of cheap knock-off Tokusatsu (think Power Rangers) toys that director Gregg Golding saw in the Mission district years ago. So he made this weird-for-the-sake-of-being-weird mess about them with a tumor growing in the collective unconscious and Reagans with aborted fetuses, dripping faucets, vaginal cucumbers, and BTK killer themes. And there's a Hindu God, and a guy who lost his dick in a motorcycle accident. And it's loud, weird, and annoying (at least, for the moments I was awake.) I think my friend Ira tweeted it best, and I really have nothing to add:
“Struggled Reagans”:
Sordid evidence as to why millennial hipsters should not be permitted to make “film”.
#MyEyesAreBleeding
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
“Struggled Reagans”:
80 useless minutes of my life that would have been better spent stabbing myself with a shrimp fork.
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
“Struggled Reagans”:
With a “script” ripped from every new-agey metaphysical self help book and skinny assholes in colorful spandex…
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
“Struggled Reagans”:
I weep for the future…
#ABW #AlwaysBeWeeping
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
“Struggled Reagans”:
A “film” that pretty much encapsulates EVERYTHING that’s wrong with San Francisco and vomits it all over your lap…
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
I rated Struggled Reagans 1/10 #IMDb http://t.co/WUioYg3XAQ
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
“Struggled Reagans”:
You thought you hated Mission hipsters before? Now you can see WHY.
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
“Struggled Reagans”:
The *smartest* thing about it is the title..
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Thinking of letting your kids get a degree in liberal arts..? See “Struggled Reagans” and realize the errors of your way..
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Other things that you can spend 80 minutes doing that are preferable to seeing “Struggled Reagans”:
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
ANY form of invasive surgery (including maxillofacial) without the aid of anesthesia..
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Sexual exploration involving sharp, rusty, metallic objects and inadequate lubricant..
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Installing malware on your computer while listening to She Bangs via a cochlear implant, drinking arsenic through a crazy straw…
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Performing naked, tantric, yoga positions in front of your close family while pulling anal beads made of old softballs from your rectum…
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Not sure if I’m getting my true feelings on record about this whole “Struggled Reagans” thing. But I’m trying, Ringo.. I’m trying real hard.
— Perfect_Timing (@Perfect_Timing) December 12, 2013
Total Running Time: 147 minutesMy Total Minutes: 346,060
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