Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Jason sneaks into and watches RESIDENT EVIL: AFTERLIFE in 3D

Because I ain't paying for this shit, and oddly the thrill of sneaking into a 3-D movie and having the glasses with you is kinda fun.

I could tell you about how the RESIDENT EVIL has run its course and they shouldn't still make these movies, but that was true with the first one. I could also tell you how 3-D added absolutely nothing. And I suppose I could at least provide a courtesy of a brief plot summary. But instead I'll treat this movie with as much courtesy as it deserves.

The only thing I want to mention is related to the 3-D effects. There are maybe a half dozen scenes where Alice (Mila Jovovich) is speaking directly into a video camera. We see the video screen, and with the 3-D effect, the video status icons (timemark, etc) are floating above the screen. Why? Why the fuck would you put in an artificial 3-D effect into an inherently 2-D scene. The video screen is flat, the icons aren't floating above the screen, but they added an effect as if they were! I suppose you can come up with an explanation that the Umbrella Corporation for some retarded reason made and widely marketed a 2-D video camera with holographic icons floating above the screen. But then you'd be thinking about this about 100 times more than the filmmakers did.

You know, I normally hate people who pick on one little detail to tear apart a movie--like they like being a critic more than they like movies. But the fact is there was absolutely nothing in this movie more worth thinking about.

Total Running Time: 97 minutes
My Total Minutes: 209,620
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